Save Me -on hold-
by katelyncarlilee
Summary: Phil loved Chris. Chris loved Phil. Phil is in an abusive relationship he wants nothing more to get out of. Chris wants nothing more then to save him. But sometimes, things are harder then they seem.
1. Chapter 1

Save Me.  
Chapter 1.  
Word Count: 936

Phil walked through the empty hallway, tears burning his soft olive eyes. It was about 5 hours until RAW and the only people in the arena were some of the crew members who were making sure the ring was safe and all that. Why was he there so early? The answer was Randy. Yes, the Viper, the apex predator, Randy Orton. Lets rewind a little, shall we?

Phil let out a shaky sigh as he force his eyes up to meet Randy's icy stare. Of all the bad relationships Phil had been in, his with Randy was the worst, and he'd dated Brock Lesnar (by Paul Heymans' demands, of course) for christs sakes!

"I-I'm sorry Randy.. I-I won't see him again.." The straight-edge savior whispered timidly, like there was a gun pointed to his head and if he said the wrong statement he would get shot.

"Damn right you won't!" The younger man yelled, slapping the scared WWE champion across the face. Hard.

Phil had been out at the bar (He wasn't drinking any more then a diet Pepsi) with his best friend, Chris, earlier that night. The two had always been close, so close that some have been lead to think Phil was cheating on his lover with Chris. Of course, he wasn't, because well, that'd be the equivalent to committing suicide. But, deep down, Phil loved Chris. And, deep down, Chris loved him back. It was obvious to everyone but themselves.

When Phil had returned that night, smelling of alcohol and cheap perfume, the apex predator was furious. Jumping to conclusions, he automatically accused his lover of cheating, and beat him.

While Phil was older, Randy was much larger, and stronger, which made the man unable to defend himself against Randy's beating. To top it off, rather then just a few slaps & kicks, the viper had gone all-out and beaten the boy until he was barely conscious. Finally, after one last punch to the head, the raven collapsed on the floor, his small amount of consciousness disappearing.

When he awoke in the morning, Randy still wasn't finished. After a few good hits to the stomach, Randy finally decided he was finished and pridefully walked to the bathroom, thus allowing Phil to escape the hotel room. Figuring he had nowhere else to go, he found himself in his locker room at the Monday Night RAW arena.

Neglecting the lock on the door, he sat against a vacant wall, pulled his knees to his chest and cried. The raven sat and cried for what seemed like an eternity, but it was really only an hour and forty-five minutes. A knock on the door is what pulled the WWE champion out of his state of self-pity and misery.

"Punk? Are you in there?" He heard the Show-Off call from the hall.

"Punk? Open up!" The younger boy yelled again.

Phil slowly pushed himself off the ground, then managed to stumble over to the door and pull it open.

"What?" He murmured.

"I was ju- have you been crying?" The man asked, his voice filled with concern.

"No." The raven stated, his raw voice void of any emotion whatsoever.

"Hey," Dolph placed a hand on Phil's shoulder, "What's up?"

The two never really talked to each other outside of the ring, but they didn't dislike each other nonetheless.

But Phil simple shook his head. "I'm fine, man, don't worry about me." Then, he shut the door and locked it before either of them could say another word. He heard the Show-Off sigh before he heard footsteps walking away quietly.

* * *

Dolph shook his head, walking away from the door. He wondered why the older man was crying, though he knew he'd never get an answer out of him. Even though they are really friends, and they despise each-other on-screen, he still cared for and worried about the other man. So, he went to the only place he'd have any hope of finding the answer he seeked; he knocked on Chris' locker room door.

"Hm?" He heard from the other side of the door.

"Chris? Open up, I need to talk to you."

The door swung open, revealing the shirtless body of the one and only Chris Jericho.

"Hey, um, I went to talk to Phil about our promo tonight and he had obviously been crying and Im not sure if he noticed but he had a black eye and a broken-looking nose. He wouldn't tell what was wrong, which I kind of expected, cause, well, it's Phil, but.. He just seemed really off. He told me he was fine then shut the door and locked it.. I was hoping you'd know what's wrong?"

Chris's face contorted to pure hatred and fury as he pushed the Show Stealer out of his way, running in the direction of the Second-City Saint's room. Dolph followed, curious as to what was happening. Chris pounded on the door to Phil's locker room, yelling for him to "open the fucking door before he breaks it down". Eventually, the raven gave in and open the door.

The man said nothing, he just stood, staring at his feet, his long hair falling in front of his face, acting as a curtain to shield his broken eyes.

"Look at me." Chris demanded. Shyly, almost like he was scared, he lifted his head. His eyes refused to meet the worried and angered blue orbs of his best friend.

"Did.. Did he do this to you?"

And you know how Phil responded? He stepped backwards, slammed the door in his best friends' face, and continued his crying while Chris went back to pounding in the door.


	2. Chapter 2

Save Me.  
Chapter 2.  
Word Count: 456

"Even through the darkest days, this fire burns, always." Phil's entrance song sounded as he held up the WWE title belt he had successfully retained. Boo's and cheers sounded in the large arena as he walked back up the ramp, going to his looker room. On his way, though, the room started spinning and he fell face-first on the hard ground.

"Woah, Phil! Are you alright?" He faintly heard the voice of his road wife, Kofi Kingston.

"'M fine.." He slurred.

"C'mon, lets take you to the trainers." The high flyer helped him to his feet and acted as a support as Phil limped to the trainers.

* * *

"Well, Mr. Brooks, it appears you have a severe concussion and possible skull damage. We need to keep you overnight for further testing and such. You should be able to leave tomorrow evening, but I recommend you stay away from wrestling for a few weeks. May I ask how this happened?" The nurse wondered aloud.

"I hit a post in the ring." Phil said quickly, feeling his "boyfriend" and his two friends eyes staring at him.

"Hm, are you sure?" The nurse questioned, noticing the fear behind Phil's eyes.

He wanted desperately to tell her the truth, but he simply nodded, looking down at his lap.

"Alright. Dr. Good will be coming by to get you set up for a few tests." She said, eyeing the Straight-Edge savior suspiciously.

Once she had left and shut the curtain, Randy directed his attention to Chris.

"Out." He said bluntly.

"Huh?" Chris rose one eyebrow.

"I said. Out. Do I need to spell it out for you?"

Chris just stared at Randy, confusion written all over his face.

"Why?"

"I don't want you seeing him," He nodded in Phil's direction, "So, get the fuck out."

"Stop, Randy. It's not-"

"No!" He cut Phil off, "I want him out. I told you you can't see him anymore." Randy growled, glaring down at his boyfriend.

Phil shrunk in the uncomfortable bed, glancing over to the side, only to see his friends had already left.

Before Phil had the chance to say anything, the doctor enter the room. He looked far too happy to be working in a hospital at 1:30am.

"Hello, Mr. Brooks," The doctor greeted, shaking his hand, "I'm Dr. Good. I'm gonna do a few tests then you can get some rest, all right?"

The raven nodded shyly, looking down.

"So, how're you feeling?"

"I'm okay."

Never in his life had he told a bigger lie.


	3. Chapter 3

Save Me.  
Chapter 3.  
Word Count: 641

Phil was released from the hospitals care two days later. He had a severe concussion, and wasn't medically cleared to compete for another 1-2 weeks. His head hurt and all he wanted to do was sleep. But, his friend Jeff had other plans.

Jeff had been attempting to talk to the younger man for almost a full hour now, not getting much of a response from the man.

"I'll leave you alone for now, but I'm comin' back soon, and I will get answer from you." The high flyer stated, almost glaring at Phil as he got up and wrapped him in his warm embrace. He softly kissed his best friends forehead.

"Adam's waiting. I gotta start headin' home. Take care of yourself." And with that, his friend was out the door.

Phil stared up at the ceiling, chewing on his lip ring. It was a nervous habit. Randy always told him he was going to rip his lip soon, not that his boyfriend really cared, anyways.

The broken man sighed as he rolled on to his side. He wish his rainbow-haired friend hadn't left. Because, when it was only Phil and Randy, the worst was bound to happen.

"Babe?" Randy asked, knocking on the door.

"Uh-huh.." The raven mutter, his throat dry and sore.

"Everything okay..?" He wonder aloud, entering the room without permission.

"Mhm.. 'M tired.." The Second-City Saint mumbled, hiding his face in the pillow.

"Listen.. I-I'm sorry.. I can't believe I hurt you that bad.."

"'S fine.."

The Viper crawled into bed with the older man, pulling him into his chest. The Raven hummed, pulling the blanket up to his nose. He snuggled into his boyfriends chest, falling asleep seconds later.

Phil never understood it, but he could never sleep unless he was in his boyfriends arms. Even if they were in the same bed, if he wasn't wrapped in his boyfriends strong embrace, sleep would never come to him. It really made no sense, how much he needed the man who hurts him, the man who broke him.

* * *

Phil awoke with a start, running a hand through his hair. 'Just a dream' he reminded himself. He look at the empty space beside him, before he looked at the clock. 1:35PM. Phil groaned internally and crawled out of bed. He quickly leaned on the wall, as he was about to fall on the floor. The raven sighed as he continued walking, using the wall as support.

He entered the kitchen, wondering where his lover went. The older man noticed a note on the counter. He read it over, or at least tried to make out the words written in his husbands messy, messy scrawl.

Went out. Be back later. -Randy

This made the raven frown. Where was his boyfriend when he needed him? Without thinking, he picked up his phone and dialed Chris' number.

* * *

"I can't believe you! I told you you can't see him anymore!" The Apex Predator screamed.

"I-I'm sorry Randy.. I won't see him ag-"

Phil was cut off by a harsh slap to the face. The older man hissed as he held his cheek.

"You and I BOTH know that's a fucking lie. You worthless prick. How did I ever end up with a little slut like you?!" The younger man was so angry, Phil could've sworn there was steam coming from his ears.

"O-Oh.." Phil mumbled, looking down.

Phil had never felt so down on himself before. Maybe Randy was right. Maybe that's all he was, a worthless prick, a slut. Phil stood up, walking to the door, and leaving without so much as a goodbye.

_Hai. I dont know if I mentioned this, but i wont be able to update much. We have one week till summer break so theres lots of school stuff happening, and on top of that, my laptop is broken. I have a PC, but it hardly works, so I'll update when I can get it to work. Also, this is my first story I'm publishing, and I'm not a very good writer, so please, if you have nothing nice to say, dont say anything at all. I just write for myself, its an escape from reality. My stories tend to be pretty angst-y, so if you dont like that you should probably stop reading.. yeah thats all. Thanks for reading c: byeee x_


	4. Chapter 4

**Save Me.**  
**Chapter 4.**  
**Word Count: 675**

* * *

The younger mans body trembled as his best friend took his arm into his hands.

"Oh, Philly.." Jeff mumbled, eyes filling with tears as he looked into the olive colored eyes.

"Why would you do this?" The Rainbow Warrior shook his head as his eyes fell back to his best friends arm and studied the artwork the younger man had created.

"'M sorry.." Phil's body shook as another sob wracked through his body.

Nearly 30 lines could be seen on the mans arm. Some of them were fading scars from the past, some were small scratches that barely bled. But there were six marks that stood out more then the rest. Six deep, red gashes that were bleeding profusely.

"I thought you were better. I thought this was over." Jeff shook his head, as if he didn't believe it.

"I-I am. I'm all better Jeffy. Just forget about this, okay? I'm perfectly fine."

"I can't just forget that my best friend is hurtin' himself, Phil! Why did you do this? What made you do this again?" Jeff fell to his knees in front of the other man.

Silence.

"Phil, please.."

"Nothing, Jeff. Nothing. Please just let this go."

"I can't just 'let it go', Phil." Jeff's eyes narrowed.

"At least stop worrying, okay? I can take care of myself. I've got R-Randy, right?" The Straight-Edge Savior stuttered, and hell, even he was unsure of himself.

The Charismatic Enigma's eyes widen in realization. "This is Randy's fault, isn't it?"

Phil open his mouth to protest, but really, all he wanted was to be away from all of this pain.

"Yes, and no.."

* * *

Chris groaned as his phone rang, awakening him from his peaceful slumber.

"What is it, Phil?" He mumbled tiredly into the phone.

"Mind comin' to the hospital?" Jeff responded, his voice free of emotion.

"Jeff? What? Why?" Chris was wide awake now.

"Phil. He's cut himself again, and he's been askin' for ya." The man's southern accent seemed to become stronger when he spoke without emotion.

"Oh, fuck. I'll be there in half an hour." With that he hung up.

Chris slid his shoes on and grabbed his jacket. He slid his iPhone into his pocket, then he was out the door. He sped down to the hospital, worried for his best friend. He arrived in around twenty minutes and entered the emergency room.

"I'm here for Phil Brooks."

"That young man is certainly becoming well-known around here." Chris shot her a small smile as she pressed a button located on the wall near her computer, opening the door that lead to where the patients were. "Straight down the hallway."

Chris turned down the hall, already knowing exactly where they were. The curtain was pulled aside slightly, and he could see the multicolored locks of hair that belonged to Jeff. Once he approached the 'room' he pulled the curtain back. Phil's head snapped up, but he seemed to relax once he realized it was only Chris.

"Hey.." Chris' eyes trailed down to Phil's now bandaged arm. Only two of the cuts needed stitches (14 stitches total), but his whole arm was bandaged to prevent infection.

"Why, Phil?" He knelt down in front of his friend, taking the younger man's unharmed hand in his.

"Because.." Phil mumbled, obviously not wanting to talk.

Chris sighed and looked to Jeff, hoping for an answer. All he got, though, was a simple shrug.

"Not my job to tell you. He'll tell you when he's ready."

Chris sighed, but nodded anyways. He looked back at Phil's tear-stained face, and pulled him into a strong hug.

"It'll be okay.." He soothed as he pet the younger man's hair, allowing him to cry on his shoulder. But he couldn't help but think, would it really be okay?


	5. Chapter 5

**Save Me.**

**Chapter 5.**

**Word Count: 1,162**

* * *

_Phil moaned as he tangled his hands into the older man's short hair, pushing his head further onto his shaft. He could feel himself getting closer to completion. The man gagged slightly, taking Phil's full length down his throat. He felt a cold hand play with his balls, which sent him over the edge._

_"Oh, Chris!" He moaned as he came down his best friends throat. He watched as the man swallowed most of his seed, then came back up to kiss his lips, making him taste himself._

"Phil? Phil, wake up."

"Hm?" Phil sat up, looking into Chris's eyes.

"C'mon, it's 2:30. Get outta bed."

Phil groaned, silently wishing his dream had been real.

"But 'm tired.." He mumbled into his pillow.

He let out a rather unmanly scream as he was pulled out of the warm bed by his ankles. Phil then felt himself being lifted from the ground into a pair of strong arms, and he started to panic.

"It's alright. It's just me." Chris assured him.

Phil relaxed into his arms, snuggling further into his chest. But it didn't last long, because he felt himself being lowered onto a chair at the small table in the small hotel room. Phil rested his head down on the table.

"So," Chris paused, "When are you gonna tell me why you did that." It was more a statement then a question.

He didn't receive much of an answer, though, only a soft shrug of Phil's shoulders.

"You can trust me, you know."

Phil started scratching at his arms through his long sleeved gray shirt. At first, Chris thought he was just itchy, but then he notice Phil reach down his sleeved and literally dug his nails into his skin.

"Hey." Chris pulled his arm out of his sleeve, noticing fresh blood coating his nails. Chris sighed and stood up, walking until he entered the small in-suite bathroom. He pulled the first-aid kit out from under the sink, then walked back to the "kitchen", seeing Phil staring out the window, no expression on his face. Chris frowned, kneeling down in front of the younger man, taking his arm and rolling up his sleeve slightly. He grabbed a gauze-pad and medical tape, then he placed the gauze on his friends injured arm, quickly wrapping the medical tape around it to keep the gauze there.

"Stop doing this, Phil.." The older man sighed, looking into his best friends eyes.

He hated to see his best friend.. the man he _loves _doing this to himself. He wished to help the younger man, but he didn't even know what was wrong. Phil was so secretive, so independent, it almost made Chris _angry _sometimes. But he could never stay mad at Phil. No, there was something about him. Maybe it was his personality, maybe it was his smile, maybe it was how excited he got over little things, maybe it was his long hair, maybe it was his straight-edge lifestyle, maybe it was his (usual) cheeriness, Chris didn't know, but something about the younger man always drew him closer, made him want _more_.

Phil was unresponsive. He just shrugged and let his hair fall in front of his face, like a curtain hiding his beautiful face from the world.

"I hate seeing you so down like this.. So down on yourself." Chris admitted.

"I'll be fine. Don't worry about me. It's not like it's anything new. I fixed it last time, remember?" The raven lifted his head to look into Chris' eyes.

"We _thought _you fixed it, but obviously you didn't." It was silent for a moment. "Please, _please _tell me what made you do this. I want to help you, Phil, I really do, but I can't if I don't even know whats wrong." Chris begged.

"I was talking to Randy last night." Phil chuckled bitterly. "After I left the hospital. Told him I wasn't coming home for a few days. He told me I didn't deserve him. Said I should go running back to you, like I always do. He asked me if you were better in bed then him. I told him I'd never even slept with you." Memories of the dream he'd had the night before fluttered back into his mind, but he chose to ignore them. "He said I was a lying slut. Told me I was just a pretty face, and said if I wasn't spreading my legs, I was good for nothing." Phil paused. "You know _why _I did this? Cause I _deserve _it. Ask Randy. Ask my parents. Ask anyone in the locker room. I'm just.. a good for nothing slut." Phil concluded with tears in his eyes.

"Phil.. Don't you _ever _say that again. You are so wrong. You have so much talent, and you certainly are not a slut. Phil, it doesn't even _matter _what Randy thinks, because he's wrong. You're perfect. And, you do _not_ deserve this. Nobody does." Chris said, looking into Phil's eyes. And then, Phil just broke down.

* * *

"Hello?" Phil heard a tired southern accent answer into the phone.

"Hey.." Phil whispered.

"Everything alright?" Jeff sounded much more awake now.

"I'm fine, calm yourself." He heard the older man sigh with relief. "I just.. need to tell someone about this."

"Okay. What?" Phil put the phone on speaker and placed it on thee bed beside him.

"I had this dream last night.. It was Chris and I. And we were.. He was.. I don't know how to explain it. But it was.. sexual." Jeff could hear the embarassm

ent in his voice, which made him chuckle. "Hey, shut up. I don't know what to make of it.. I mean, I dont think of him like that.. I think." Phil whispered the last part.

Jeff couldn't help but laugh at this. "Phil, I don't know how you're tryna kid. You obviously like Chris. I can see it in the way you look at him, the way you are around him." Jeff pointed out.

"O-Okay.. Maybe I do.. B-but I don't know what to do. He doesn't feel the same-"

"Are you blind?" Jeff cut him off. "He loves you, Phil."

"Doubt it."

"Anyways.. Have you talked to Randy?"

"I called him about an hour ago." Phil admitted.

"And...?"

"Broke up with him."

"Good. He doesn't deserve you, anyways."

"I'd say it's the other way around. Anyways, I'm gonna go to sleep now.." Phil decided, yawning as he spoke.

"Don't have anymore wet dreams about Chris." Jeff teased.

"Oh shut up. Goodnight."

Phil hung up and rested his head on the pillow, only to see Chris standing in the doorway.

* * *

**hai guys. this is probably one of the worst chapters ive ever written. im at my grandmas writing from her tablet cause I forgot the password to her laptop and she's at work.. anywhore. theres a few things I should've explained in the first chapter.**

**Phil has long hair, he's still the WWE champion, and his song is still this fire burns. i think thats all i changed. okay byeeeeeee c:**


	6. Chapter 6

**Save Me.**

**Chapter 6.**

**Word Count: 1,589**

* * *

**-Two Weeks Later-**

Phil and Chris wandered around the arena. Tonight was the first RAW since Phil had been medically cleared to complete. Phil had been sharing a hotel room with Chris, since Phil still wanted to travel with the WWE and Chris didn't want him to be alone. Randy had been calling and texting Phil like crazy, but Phil had yet to reply.

Phil hadn't made a move on Chris yet, or vice-versa. Chris had pretended he had heard any of Phil and Jeff's conversation, but he heard it all. He was overjoyed that Phil felt the same, but he didn't want to come on too strong. So he pretended he didn't know, but the thought put a smile on his face whenever he saw Phil. Phil was in denial. Whenever Jeff would tell him about how much Chris loved him, he always said Jeff was wrong, and he was lying to him. Of course, Jeff _wasn't _wrong and he _wasnt _lying. But Phil didn't believe him. After Randy, and what he said, he didn't feel like _anyone _could love him.

So, here they were, walking around the arena, half an hour before RAW. They were heading back to Chris' locker room, seeing as the audience would be entering soon. Silently, Phil prayed Randy wouldn't be there. He really didn't want to see him tonight, or ever again. Phil knew he wouldn't be _that _lucky, but for at least tonight, he hoped he wouldn't see him.

Chris had a match against Heath Slater tonight, and Phil had one against Dolph Ziggler. CM Punk had just turned face, while Dolph was still heel. Their match tonight was a hair vs hair match, and Phil was set to lose. He wasn't excited about losing his hair, but he was _scared _to have Dolph be the own shaving it.

They arrived at Chris's locker room, and, as Phil was about to head to his, he saw Randy heading toward them.

"Wait, Chris?" The younger man said as his friend was shutting the door.

"Hm?"

"Do you mind if I stay here until my match?" Phil said, sounding a bit uneasy.

"No, I don't mind.." Chris opened the door, allowing him in. "But, why?"

Phil shrugged. "Just don't wanna be by myself."

Chris nodded, accepting Phil's lie. He closed the door, watching his friend sit pretzel-style on the floor.

"I gotta get ready for my match, so.."

Phil nodded and turned around so he was facing the wall and pulled out his phone. He could hear Chris shuffling through his bag, most likely getting his ring attire.

"Mkay. I'm gonna change so.. don't look." Phil chuckled at how childish he sounded, and hearing Phil's laugh made Chris smile.

Chris pulled his shirt off over his head, then proceeded to pull his pants and boxers down. Phil decided it wouldn't hurt to sneak a peak, so he turned his head, and his eyes fell upon Chris's ass. He had to turn away quickly, though, as he could feel his jeans becoming tighter.

He waited a few more moments, before Chris informed him that he was done. Phil turned around, using all his strength to keep his eyes from wandering.

"I'll see you when I get back." Chris said, offering a breathtaking smile.

Phil nodded. "Good luck."

"Oh, trust me, I won't need it." Chris said, adding a wink at the end, making Phil roll his eyes.

He heard Chris leave, so he stood up from the floor and pulled his sweater on, pulling the sleeves down so they covered his hands and made his way out to where the rest of the roster was, watching Chris's match. Chris had easily become a favorite of the roster, because he was so nice and talkative -Chris Irvine was, at least. Chris Jericho was another story- whereas Phil was shy, antisocial, and wasn't the easiest to get along with. Most of the roster (aside from a few divas) didn't like him.

He came around to where everyone was, and was met by looks of disapproval. He stood there awkwardly, pinching the fabric of his sweater between his fingers. It didn't take long, though, for the Bella twins to notice him.

"Phil!" They screeched in unison, running over to hug him.

They both hugged him at the same time, almost making him fall over in the process.

"Are you okay?"

"Where were you?"

"Why didn't you come to RAW for two weeks?"

Phil was showered with questions from the worried girls.

"I'm fine, I was with Chris, and I had a concussion and couldn't compete."

"How'd you get a concussion?" Brie asked him.

"Hit my head in the ring." He lied through his teeth.

They didn't look like they believed him, but they changed the subject.

"What's going on with you and Chris?" Nikki asked, wiggling her eyebrows.

"Stop it. Nothing's going on. We're just friends. He was just taking care of me."

"What about Randy?" Nikki whispered so no-one else heard.

Phil wasn't extremely close with the two, but they knew he was gay, and in a relationship with Randy. Most of the talent in the company knew he was gay- part of the reason they didn't like him. No-one knew Randy was gay, though. So their relationship had been kept secret.

"We uh.. We broke up."

"Aww. You were so good for each-other." Brie said.

Yeah, good for each-other. Phil thought.

"Woah, what happened?!" Nikki exclaimed, drawing the (brief) attention of some of the roster.

Nikki's and Brie's gazes were focus on his arm. In the commotion of all the hugs, his sleeve must've rolled up, exposing his torn up arms.

He quickly rolled his sleeve down. "Must've been the cat." He blurted out, then mentally face-palmed.

"You don't have a cat?" It was more of a question the a statement.

Phil shrugged, looking at the floor awkwardly. He felt a small hand wrap around his arm, tugging at his sleeve.

"You didn't do this to yourself.. did you?" Brie questioned, looking at him with worry shining in her eyes.

"Just.. Don't worry about it, okay? I already have enough people watching over me." They frowned, but knew not to push it.

Chris' music sounded through the arena, alerting everyone that he'd won the match.

"Our match is next," Nikki stated. "We should go get ready. Will you watch our match, too?" She asked excitedly.

"Yeah." He said, chuckling at her excitement.

"Yay!" And with that, the two girls were off.

Chris came back stage, getting congratulations and 'good job's from roster.

He walked over to the younger man, smiling slightly.

"C'mon, let's go." He said, leading Phil back to his locker room.

"So, you're getting friendly with the Bella's, eh?" He said with a wink as they headed to his room.

Phil rolled his eyes. "No, they're just friends. Besides, I'm gay, remember?"

"Oh trust me, I remember."

That confused Phil. What did he mean by that? He shrugged it off, though. He doesn't like you like that, he told himself.

They went into his locker room and chatted for around three minutes, until the Funkadactyls music sounded.

"Damn Divas having such short matches," Phil muttered. "My match is next. See ya later."

Chris sighed and ruffled Phil's hair. "I'm gonna miss your woman hair.." He teased.

Phil rolled his eyes. "I'll see you when I get back. Don't miss me too much." He winked and headed back to his own locker room.

* * *

Dolph's music sounded, verifying his victory. Phil shook his head viscously, grabbing his hair, yelling 'no' repeatedly. A devious smirk came over Dolph's face.

"Yes." He was handed a pair of scissors and an electric razor.

Phil rolled out of the ring, running up the ramp as fast as he could. As he was about to go backstage, Big E Langston lifted him off the ground and hauled him back to the ring, Phil kicking and screaming all the while. As soon as he was thrown into the ring, he rolled back out. As he gained his balance, he saw AJ Lee come out from under the ring with a steel chair, which she then proceeded to hit him over the head with, knocking him unconscious.

**-Backstage-**

About 95% of the roster watched as Dolph Ziggler shaved CM Punk's hair.

"He deserves it." Cody Rhodes muttered.

"Yeah." Agreed The Miz.

Chris shook as head. Dolph was literally shaving off bits of Phil's _skin_, and they thought he _deserved_ it? The man sighed and pulled out his phone, unable to watch Dolph finish.

Dolph's music (finally) sounded once again as he exited the ring, a proud smirk on his face. Phil had to be carried out, as he was still unconscious, due to the five more blows to the head by the steel chair.

Everyone congratulated Dolph on his victory, and his masterpiece on Phil's head. Chris ran over to his best friend who was being carried in.

"Oh, Phil.." He sighed, stroking his bloodied, bald scalp. While it was all part of the script, he knew Phil would still be devastated.

_**hai guys. it's officially summer break! I'm happy. and I might get to go down to Texas and meet my best friend :D I'm so excited you don't even know. anyways, idk what I wanted to say even. idk I love you have a beautiful day and/or night byeee c: 3**_

_oh hey did you notice how phil never watched the bellas match_

_idk im going through a bella twins faze so i had to add them in_


	7. Chapter 7

**Save Me.**

**Chapter 7.**

**Word Count: 539**

* * *

**-One Week Later-**

Phil let out a shaky sigh as he stared in amazement at the mess he'd made. Tears pooled in his eyes, but he refused to let them fall. Just one, he'd told himself. One turned into two, and two quickly became three. The cycle continued until he realized what he'd done, but that was after atleast 15. Phil was interrupted by a knock on the door.

"Phil? You in there?" Chris questioned.

"Mhm.. Be out in a second!" He started cleaning up as soon as the words left his mouth. He wrapped the blade up in toilet paper, then flushed it down the toilet. Phil then grabbed the reddened towel he carried in his gym bag and cleaned the floor & counters. Finally, he wrapped his arm, then pulled his hoodie on, making sure there was no blood on his clothes. He hid the towel & his unused razors in his gym bag, then opened the door. Chris was waiting outside, worry & curiosity written on his face.

"Everything alright?" He said as soon as Phil stepped out of the bathroom. He nodded, brushing past him and over to where the beds were.

"Show me your arms."

"What?" Phil said, mentally panicking.

"You heard me. Show. Me. Your. Arms." Chris said, and Phil knew he wasn't gonna take 'no' for an answer.

Phil bit his lip and rolled up his sleeve, revealing his unharmed arm.

"See? Nothing." He said, stating the obvious.

"Other one."

Phil let out a shaky sigh and rolled up his other sleeve, showing this wrapped up arm. Chris frowned.

"They uh.. They opened so I bandaged them." He lied, and from the look on Chris's face, he didn't believe it.

"I'm not stupid, Phil." He narrowed his eyes at the younger man, making Phil bow his head.

"Why the hell would you do this?!" Chris exclaimed, startling Phil.

"I-I'm sorry.." Phil used all his strength to hold in the tears.

Chris shook his head. "Oh I know, you say your sorry, you cry, and everything just goes back to normal. Not this time, though."

Phil didn't respond, and after a moment Chris chuckled bitterly. "You're pathetic."

And with that, he left.

* * *

It was now three AM. Phil hadn't shown up for RAW, nor did he bother watching it. Vince had been calling non-stop throughout the two hours, but Phil didn't answer or return his calls, hell he didn't even bother to listen to the voicemails.

So here he sat, curled up on his bed, music blasting through his headphones, staring out the window.

"What if I just jumped.." He whispered to himself.

He got up and walked over to the large window of the 15th floor hotel room., staring down at the road.

"It'd be so easy.." He mumbled.

Just then, he heard the door to the hotel room close. He jumped, and saw that it was Chris.

"Phil.. I-I'm sorry.." But Phil just shook his head. He walked over to his bed and laid down under the warm covers before falling asleep, his music still playing.

_hmmm I wonder what chris's problem was. hey hey hey guys I am Seth Rollins and seth rollins is me ok he listens to adtr bmth etf abr and tbs I'm screaming_

**_this chapter was shit bc I'm sick and really depressed and life sucks rn so this was the best I could do /: ill try and make the next chapter longer & better_.**


	8. Chapter 8

**Save Me.**  
**Chapter 8.**  
**Word Count: 1,425**

_**Hi guys. tis me. I just wanted to say a huge thank-you to those of you leaving reviews. It really means a lot. Like, last night, it was 2 AM and I was gonna go to sleep, then I looked at the reviews and started writing. I would especially like to thank MissNormanMorissey, for reviewing basically every chapter I posted c: Okay, well, onto the story.**_

* * *

Phil woke up surprisingly early the next morning. The sky was just starting to become blue, so he imagined it was only 5AM. He rose out of bed, and quietly walked over to the window, careful not to wake Chris. He just stood there, staring at the night sky, basking in it's beauty. He watched the way the stars twinkled against the dark blue sky, kind of like Chris's eyes. Phil quickly shook his head to eliminated the thought. Chris had been the only thing on Phil's mind as of late. He really liked Chris, but feared rejection, therefore didn't act on his emotions.

"Beautiful, isn't it?" He heard Chris's soft voice whisper in his ear and he jumped slightly.

"Y-yeah.. sure is.." He mumbled, turning his attention to Chris.

"Listen, Phil, I-I'm sorry for last night.. I just- I don't know why I said what I did.. I'm so sor-" Phil cut him off mid sentence.

"It's fine, really. Don't worry about it." He lied, forcing a smile. It really wasn't fine, but, he didn't want Chris feeling bad.

"No, no it's not. Phil, I wanna help you, and I swear I'll do whatever it takes to make you better." The two were sitting on Chris's bed now.

"Chris.. I-I'm so happy and grateful that you care, really. I'm just.. scared." He whispered the last part under his breath.

"Why, Phil? What are you scared of?" Chris asked, taking one of Phil's soft hands into his own.

"People judging me. I mean, if I.. if if I do get help.. What if- Never mind, it's stupid.." Phil sighed, casting his eyes downward.

"No it's not. Tell me."

"What if they all laugh in my face and tell me I'm stupid, I'm overreacting. What if they tell me I'm wrong, what if they won't help me because I'm.. gay." He mumbled, still avoiding Chris's eyes.

"Phil, I promise you that won't happen. They're there to help you, not hurt you. We'll make an appointment for, hopefully, tomorrow, and talk to a counsellor. I'm not sure how this'll work, with traveling and stuff, but we'll figure it out. And, if it makes you feel any better, I'll go in with you." Chris offered with a small smile.

Phil looked up briefly, then threw his arms around Chris's neck.

"Chris.. Thank you so much.." He murmured into the crook of his neck, breathing in his scent.

Chris wrapped his arms around Phil's midsection. "I'll do whatever it takes to make you better.. I miss your beautiful smile." Chris said, then mentally slapped himself.

Phil pulled back then. "B-beautiful?"

"I.. Uh.. Y-Yeah.. Phil, you're the most beautiful thing I've ever laid eyes on.." Chris admitted shyly.

"Really? But.. I-I'm not-"

"Don't try and tell me you're not," Chris cut him off. "You're absolute perfection."

"C-Can I try something?" Phil asked nervously, his eyes flickering down to Chris's lips.

"Sure, but, wha-" Chris was cut off when Phil's lips met his.

He reacted immediately, wrapping his arms around Phil's waist, bringing him closer and kissing him with all the passion he could muster, which made Phil snake his arms around Chris's neck. The kiss wasn't heated and sexual, it was full of passion and love. After several moments, Phil pulled back.

"I-I'm sorry I shouldn't have-" Chris quickly pressed his lips to Phil's, stopping him mid-sentence.

"Don't be sorry, I liked it." Chris said with a smile, which made Phil smile too. A real smile.

"C'mon. Let's go back to bed." Chris pulled Phil down onto the mattress with him, the two of them sliding under the covers.

Phil rested his head on Chris's chest, feeling Chris wrap an arm around him. After a few moments of this, them just enjoying each others company, Phil finally spoke up.

"Chris?" He mumbled, not moving from where he lay.

"Hm?"

"What.. What are we..?" Phil asked shyly.

"Whatever you want us to be, Philly." A smile crept onto Phil's face as he closed his eyes, and merely seconds later he was asleep.

* * *

About four hours later, Chris awoke to the sound of the shower running, and took this as his chance.

He quickly hopped out of bed, making his way to Phil's suitcase. He knew he shouldn't be looking through the younger man's things, but he also knew Phil had his "tools" in there. He unzipped it and rummaged around a bit, until he found what he was looking for. A small, clear, plastic container holding maybe.. six small pieces of metal. Chris heard the water stop and he quickly zipped the bag back up. He hid the small box in his suitcase, then laid back down on the bed, picking his phone up off the beside table and opening Twitter.

Chris heard the bathroom door open and he looked over towards it. Phil came out seconds later, in nothing but a towel, which was wrapped around his waist, rather lowly. Chris bit his lip, feeling his cock harden at the site. _Oh, if that towel were to fall.._ He thought to himself.

"Take a picture, it'll last longer." Phil chuckled, pulling a pair of boxers, a pair of jeans, and a Rancid t-shirt.

"I might have to do that.." Chris said playful.

"Oh, please. Now, turn around, I needa change." Phil said, waiting with a hand on his hip.

Chris chuckled and shook his head, turning over on the mattress. He waited a few moments, playing with the sheets

"Done."

Chris turned around and saw Phil standing up by his own bed. Chris stood up and walked over to him, wrapping his arms around Phil's waist and pulling him in for a kiss. He kissed back immediately, melting in to Chris's touch. Chris pulled away for breath first.

"Phil," Chris rested his head on Phil's forehead. "I love you so much. W-Will you be my boyfriend?" He whispered, his hot breath tickling Phil's cheeks.

"Of course." Phil breathed, kissing him once more.

* * *

"Chrissy.. I'm scared.." Phil whispered as they lay in Chris's bed.

"Why, babe?" Chris asked, looking down to meet Phil's eyes.

"R-Randy.. Do you think he'll take kindly to this? I just broke up with him and he doesn't exactly like you.. Its not like I can avoid him forever." Phil sighed, worry clear in his voice.

"Phil.. I won't let him come near you, ever. As long as I'm around, I won't let anybody hurt you again."

A small smile spread across his face. "T-Thank you.." He mumbled.

Chris just kissed his forehead. They lay together in silence for a few minutes, before Phil spoke up.

"Wait, since when did you like guys? I mean, you have kids.." Phil trailed off, not wanting to mention Jessica.

"I don't. I just.. Like you." Chris admitted shyly.

"Oh?" Phil asked, sitting upright.

"Yeah. You, you're.. Perfect. Everything about you is perfect. Your eyes, your smile, your piercings, your tattoos, your personality. How you can be super confident, or super shy. How strong you are, mentally and physically. How you're always yourself. You're just.. Perfect."

Phil had a huge grin on his face. He leaned forward and kissed Chris on the lips, before moving to his jawline. He placed kiss all along his jaw, up to his ear. He kissed behind Chris's ear, earning a small moan from the older man. He moved back down his jawline, then back to his lips.

"Thank you," Phil said once he pulled away. "I needed that."

Chris smiled as Phil snuggled into his side.

"Can we have an animated movie marathon and eat junk food, please? I mean, we don't have anywhere to go today.." Phil asked, pleading with his eyes.

Chris chuckled. "Of course."

Phil's face lit up like a kid in a candy store.

"Get dressed! Lets go!" Phil said jumping out of bed, pulling Chris with him.

"Alright, alright. Give me five minutes."

"Fineee. Hurry up though!"

Chris chuckled, shaking his head. Phil could be the cutest person ever, or the sexiest person ever. It made him laugh, how Phil could be so calm one moment, then be bouncing off the walls the next.

_hihihi i felt really giddy while writing this omg finally they together. okay um yeah ily I think I'm gonna post a one shot tonight byeee_


	9. Chapter 9

**Save Me.**  
**Chapter 9.**  
**Word Count: 1,267**

* * *

The two stayed up into the early hours of the morning, watching Disney movies. Now, it was nearly four in the afternoon, and the two had woken up only a half hour ago. They had already showered (together, might I add), and where getting dressed, for no particular reason.

"Um, Chris?" Phil said curiously as he searched his bag.

"Yeah?"

"Were you in my suitcase?" Phil asked, slightly angered now.

"No, why?" Chris lied.

"Because I'm missing something," Phil sat on his knees with his bum between his feet, turning his attention to Chris. "and you're the only one I could see taking it. Besides, no-one else has even been here."

"Oh? What is it you're missing?" Chris asked, attempting to seem interested.

"My razors." Phil was incredibly blunt. "I've looked everywhere and I can't seem to find them."

"Well why would you need those?" Chris sat on the opposite side of Phil's suitcase.

"I don't need them right now.. I just need to know I have them. Which, right now, I don't."

"You don't need them at all." Chris pointed out.

"Yes I do."

"No."

"Just answer my question. Did you fucking take them?" Phil was beyond angry now.

"Yeah. I did. Cause you don't need them anymore." Chris pointed out.

"Who are you to tell me what I need? More importantly, what the hell made you think you had the right to look through my shit?!" Phil exclaimed. They were both standing now.

"You don't need them, because you're better then that. Plus, I'm your boyfriend. You gave me that right when you agreed to date me."

"I'm sorry. Where did you get that idea? That is most certainly not what I agreed to. If I were to've gone through Randy's stuff, I'd be dead." Phil could feel his blood boiling.

"I'm not Randy."

"I'm going for a walk." Phil stated roughly, pulling on his hoodie.

"Not by yourself you're not."

"Not like you're gonna stop me."

Phil quickly finished putting on his Converse and headed out the door.

* * *

Phil was sitting against a brick wall nearly three hours later when he was approached. At first he was frightened, but then he recognized the familiar face.

"Punk? What're you doing out here?" Jon, better know as Dean Ambrose, asked him.

"Sitting." Phil answered distantly, chewing on his lip ring, staring at the wall in-front of him.

"I noticed. Why, though?" Jon asked.

"Cause I feel like it."

"Something bothering you?" He'd never really talked to Jon, or any of the shield, but he did know they were a part of the very small group of people who didn't hate him.

"A little." Phil frowned.

"What's the matter? You can trust me." Jon wondered.

"Promise you won't judge me?" Jon replied with a nod.

"Well, Chris and I started dating two nights ago. I was getting dressed this morning- er, afternoon, and I was missing something. I asked Chris if he took it and he did, and we got into a fight and I left. That was a few hours ago and now.. here we are."

"Well what was it he took?" Dean questioned.

"Rather not say."

"Alright. I know you're made he went through your stuff, but.. everybody makes mistakes, right? You should go talk to him." The younger man suggested.

"Yeah, I guess. Thanks, Jon." Phil stood up and brushed himself off, and the two of them headed back to the hotel.

* * *

"Back." Phil muttered, sliding out of his shoes.

"Where were you?" Chris asked, jumping up from their bed.

"Sitting outside some building. I talked to Jon a bit, he convinced me to come back. And here we are."

"I was so worried." Chris pulled Phil into a tight hug. "I promise I'll never give do that again."

"O-Okay." Sometimes, Phil wished he wasn't so forgiving.

* * *

"C-Chris.." Phil moaned as his boyfriend groped him through his trunks, kissing his neck as he did so.

"S..Stop.. We-We can't.. I've got a- Fuck- a match.." Phil barely said.

"Please Chris.. St-Sto- AH!" He cut himself off as Chris shoved a hand down his ring attire, the older mans cold hands alarming him.

"C'mon baby.. We have time.." Chris pleaded.

"N-No.." Phil pushed him off, fixing his trunks before looking in the mirror.

"Well, fuck." Phil's eyes fell upon the impressively large bulge in his attire.

There was a knock on the door. "Five minutes, Punk!" One of the crew members yelled.

"Shit." He hissed, biting his lip.

He turned around to bitch at Chris, but he was already gone.

"Little fucker." He mumbled, unsure of what to do.

His phone buzzed and he lifted it up from the bean-bag chair, seeing a message from Chris.

_good luck (; x -Chris_

_Fuck you. -Phil_

_later baby. -Chris_

_You wish. -Phil_

"Two minutes, Punk!" The crew-member yelled through the door.

"Yeah, yeah." Phil tossed his phone down on the chair and headed out to the gorilla.

He had a match against The Miz tonight, and god would it be awkward. He'd always had a small crush on Mike, and now he was gonna fight him, while he had a boner. Phil bit his lip as he headed out to the ramp, doing his "it's clobbering time" thing, then heading to the ring, wanting this match to be over as fast as possible.

* * *

Phil and Chris lay together on the bed they shared, kissing each other mindlessly. Clothing had been discarded around the room, leaving Phil in only boxers, and Chris with no shirt. They were interrupted, though, when there was a harsh knock on the door.

"Fuck." Phil sighed, sitting upright.

"You gonna get that?" Chris asked.

"Um, I'm the one in only underwear here!" Chris chuckled and got up, answering the door.

"He- Um.. what're you doing here?"

"I came to see Phil." The all-too-familiar voice stated bluntly.

"He's not available right now." Chris said, not necessarily lying.

Randy chuckled bitterly. "Fucking him, eh? Isn't he just such a slut in bed?"

"Excuse me?" Phil said, approaching the front door.

"Thought you were busy." Randy mocked.

"Or I just didn't want to see you. What's this about me being a slut?" Phil hid his nearly naked body behind Chris, poking his head over Chris's shoulder.

"It's true." Randy shrugged. "You're a slut, and you take a cock like one. Oh, and would you look at that." He gestured to Phil's arm. "You've started cutting yourself. You're so pathetic."

"You need to leave." Phil stated.

"Fine. But, don't worry, I'll be back." And with that, Randy strode down the hall, to the elevator.

"Phil I'm sor-"

"It's fine. Now, where were we?" Phil grinned, leading Chris back to the bed.

He pretended like the slut comment didn't effect him, but it did. He pretended the pathetic comment didn't effect him either, but it did, too. Chris had called him exactly that just a few days before. And, now, Phil feared for his life. He didn't know what Randy was capable of, but he sure was scared.

* * *

**_Philly pie you've been dating for like five days keep it in your pants_**  
**_randy why you gotta be so mean okok love you baaai_**


	10. Chapter 10

**Save Me.**

**Chapter 9.**

**Word Count: 940**

* * *

Phil and Chris didn't go very far last night. They made out for a while, but Phil didn't seem like himself. Chris could tell he was hurting, so they spent the night kissing and cuddling, enjoying each-others company. Phil liked it better that way. Nobody had really wanted him for as long as he could remember. People just used him for sex. But Chris was different. Phil felt like Chris cared, someone finally cared. He loved Chris with everything in his being.

Now, it was morning. Chris was still sleeping, and Phil lay awake in his arms, enjoying the feeling of being held. Of course, it didn't last long, because his phone started ringing. Jeff's theme music played from his phone, and he instantly felt bad. He had totally forgotten to call Jeff. He picked up his iPhone and pressed 'answer'.

"Phil!? Are you alright? I've been trying to call you for the past two fucking weeks!" His southern-accented friend yelled down the line.

"Jeff, can you please not yell? Chris is sleeping and I don't wanna-"

"Oooh, so you're with Chris now?" Jeff's anger melted away into excitement.

"Yeah, we got together a few nights ago." Phil smiled.

"Told ya he liked you. Wait, did you fuck him yet?" Jeff was smirking, even though Phil couldn't see.

"Jeff!" Phil whined. "No, I haven't fucked him."

"Get on that."

"Jeff, ya nasty." Phil chuckled.

"When'll you be in down here?" Jeff said, changing the subject.

"Um, three days I think."

"Text me when you get here. Don't forget!" Jeff said, hanging up afterwards.

"Who was that?" Chris asked tiredly.

"Oh, hey. Sorry if I woke you up. It was Jeff, I haven't talked to him in like 2 weeks." Phil said, turning over to look at Chris.

"Ah. So, what do you wanna do today?"

"Nothing." Phil groaned.

"I'm afraid that's not possi-" Chris was interrupted by a knock on the door.

"Phil, we don't have to answer it." But Phil was already out of bed and on his way to the door.

Phil quickly slid into his Batman pajama pants before he unlocked the door and swung it open.

"Leave." He growled.

"Rather not." The devious voice laughed.

"Randy, I don't have time for this." Phil sighed, trying to stand his ground, but he was terrified.

"Too busy fucking Chris?" Randy spat in his face.

"For your information, I haven't had sex with him. Now what the hell do you want?" Phil was almost yelling now.

"You." Randy said seductively, an evil smirk playing on his lips.

"Well you can't-" Phil was cut off by a slap to the face.

"You don't disobe-" Phil was carefully pushed away from the door, then Randy was pushed to the floor.

"How DARE you hit him like that!?" Chris screamed, jumping on Randy, throwing punches to Randy's face.

Phil stood watching in shock as Chris attacked Randy. Phil heard footsteps running over, and then all three Shield members came and pulled Chris off Randy.

"What the hell?" Dean asked, looking as shocked as Phil.

"That bastard has NO right to hurt Phil." Chris growled, glaring at Randy's almost unconscious body.

Phil felt suddenly self-conscious when all eyes fell on him. He stood awkwardly for a few moments until he realized what the Hounds of Justice were staring at.

When he had opened the door, he had only thought to put on pants. He was shirtless, and his arms were uncovered. He quickly his them behind his back, his gaze flickering to the floor.

"Uh, Phil? What were those..?" Seth asked.

Phil didn't answer, he just looked at Chris helplessly.

"Did you do that to yourself..?" Dean questioned, stepping forward.

Silence.

"Phil?"

"Yes, okay?! Yes, I did this to myself." Phil went back into the hotel room and shut the door, locking it as well.

"Phil? I didn't mean to upset you.." Dean said helplessly.

Phil heard the lock click and he crawled away from the door. He'd totally forgotten Chris had a key-card.

"Sorry. He's been a bit.. moody lately. I'll talk to him, okay?" Chris said as he entered the room.

"Okay." Dean said, his eyes falling on Phil.

He offered a small smile before the three left, and Chris closed the door. He walked over to Phil, lifting him up off the floor and laying him on the bed that they shared. He lifted the covers over Phil's shirtless body, then crawled in bed next to him.

Chris reached out and stroke Phil's cheek, making him wince in pain.

"My baby.. I shouldn't have let you answer the door.. I won't let him hurt you, ever, ever again.. I'll do everything I can to keep safe.." Chris rambled on.

"Chris it's fine.. Please stop worrying about it. I don't want you getting hurt." Phil whispered, eyes fluttering closed as Chris's fingers brushed over his cheek once more.

"Dont worry about me. Randy could shoot me, I could care less as long as you're safe." Chris sighed, biting his lip.

"I wouldn't be able to live with myself if you got hurt." Phil mumbled, Chris's touch nearly making him fall asleep.

"I can hardly live with myself knowing he hurt you."

"Touché." Phil chuckled. "Now can we sleep?"

"Of course, babe." Chris kissed his cheek before pulling him closer.

* * *

_**gUYS IM LIKE OUT OF IDEAS THESE CHAPTERS SUCKED BC I HAVE NO IDEAS OTHER THEN SOMETHING WITH RANDY AN SOMETHING WITH SETH PLEASE LEAVE ME IDEAS thanks ily byeee**_


	11. Chapter 11

**Save Me.**  
**Chapter 11.**  
**Word Count: 1,501**

* * *

**-One week later-**

Phil had come clean to Jon, as well as the rest of the shield, about his cutting problem. The five had become extremely close since that day, especially Phil and Seth.

Chris had given Randy a minor concussion, which was determined when Ted Dibiase Jr had found him in the hallway and taken him to the hospital. Randy hasn't bugged them since, but Phil still lived in fear. He was afraid to leave the hotel room, and especially afraid of going to the arena. He didn't even like being alone in Chris's locker room during one of Chris's matches. He'd even gotten Vickie to allow him to be a guest commentator once.

Now, Phil sat in the Shield's locker room, him and Seth the only ones in there. Dean and Roman had gone to catering with Chris, which Phil had turned down (earning a skeptical look from Chris), and Seth had stayed with him.

As of late, Seth had been rather.. clingy. He always wanted to be with Phil, he followed him around like a lost puppy. It made Chris slightly jealous that Phil was spending so much time with Seth, but he didn't want to seem over-protective, so he didn't say anything.

Phil had gone to one counseling session, where he had been officially diagnosed with depression, severe anxiety, and post-traumatic stress disorder. The doctor had also said he showed signs of anorexia, but she couldn't make an official diagnoses. He was given anti-depressants and anti-anxiety pills. Phil's doctor also told him to get at least two months time off work, to relax, and be able to attend weekly counseling sessions. Phil had agreed immediately, but was a lot less excited when he realized Chris wouldn't be with him.

Phil was due to leave for Chicago the next morning. He and Chris planned to have a night to themselves, if you catch my drift. Of course, they had to wait until RAW was over.

The door swung open and 2/3 of the Shield entered, along with Chris.

"Hey, babe." Chris said, smiling and kissing Phil's cheek.

Phil could've sworn he saw Seth frown slightly.

* * *

"Look at you, Punk. You're a pathetic excuse of a man. First you lose a match to Rey Mysterio, and now you can't even fight off my girlfriend? That's jus-"

"I told you I would never hit a woman, Dolph." Phil growled into his mic.

"Because you're afraid of them? Or, wait, is it because you're daddy used to hit your mommy?" Dolph snickered, and Phil felt a pain in his chest.

'That wasn't in the script..' Phil thought to himself, as he felt his blood boil. He didn't act on his anger, instead he just remained silent.

"Let's play a little game called 'Point out everything wrong with CM Punk'. Shall we?" Dolph chuckled evilly as the crowd (mostly) booed.

"Well, too bad. We're playing anyways." Dolph said.

"Firstly, those awful tattoos. Pepsi? Eggs and bacon? What's the point?

"Secondly, that beard. You look like a lumberjack. I don't know how anyone could love someone who looked like that.

"Thirdly, those arms. Do you even work out? Look, they're all flabby." Dolph lifted one of his arms.

"Fourth, your body. Again, work out at all? You're so fat, your stomach sticks out around your trunks!"

Phil had stop listening now. While this was all scripted, it hurt. Dolph's words replayed in his head. You're so fat. Do you even work out? You look like a lumberjack. Those awful tattoos. Phil bit his lip, suddenly feeling incredibly self-conscious.

"Dolph, stop." Phil cut him off at around his 11th flaw.

"I'm not perfect. Shoot me. I've made my fair share of mistakes, yeah. But at least I'm not a spaghetti-haired manwhore who used to be a cheerleader." Phil ignored the PG rule. "You just lost your title, now all you have left is your girlfriend, but I'm sure that wont last long." Phil spat and dropped his mic.

Dolph looked shocked, and a little embarrassed. What Phil had said wasn't scripted. Phil left the ring, his music didn't hit, and he headed to the back. He ran to his locker room, ignoring the looks he was getting from the other superstars. Once he entered, he slammed the door shut, locking it afterwards.

hey, what the hell was that?

Dolph texted him, but Phil was too preoccupied to reply. He changed out of his trunks, and put on a pair of boxers, jeans, and his 'Knees 2 Faces' shirt. He kept his wrist tape on, then sat on the floor.

Dolph was right. Phil thought. I'm not a real man.

Just then there was a knock on the door.

"Phil? You in here?" AJ Lee asked sweetly.

"Yeah," Phil mumbled. "One second."

He got up and unlocked the door, opening it afterwards.

"Are you okay? That was so wrong of Dolph to mention your dad, I'm so sorry, really it was-"

"It's fine, AJ. Is that all you came here for?" Phil didn't mean to sound rude, but he really didn't feel like any human interaction.

"I also wanted to tell you that it was really hot, how you stood up for yourself." AJ said, running her fingers up Phil's chest.

"April, stop." Phil grabbed her hand and pulled it away. "You're a great girl, but, I play for the other team, if you know what I mean."

"Huh?" AJ had an oblivious look on her face.

"I've got an alternative lifestyle?"

"I still don't understand." AJ looked confused.

Phil rolled his eyes. "I'm gay, AJ. I like men."

"Oh." AJ nodded. "Well, don't worry, Punk. Soon I'll have you head over heels in love with me." She had a devious look in her eyes as she skipped away.

"Good luck." He muttered.

Just as Phil was about to close the door, he heard his name being called. He turned his head, seeing the one and only Dolph Ziggler.

"Hey, listen hear, Punk. I'm gonna take your title from you. Just wait. And if I ever see you talking to AJ again I swear-"

"Why did you bring up my parents?" Phil asked, and Dolph's face softened.

"It was a mistake, I'm-"

"Do you know how much that hurt?" Phil cut Dolph off.

"Um, I-"

"Keep an eye on your girlfriend. I have a feeling she's after someone else. Oh, and next time you say something like that, don't expect me to let you off so easy. Now go."

Dolph gave a slow, frightened nod and took off. Phil looked around to make sure no-one else wanted him, but sure enough, Chris was coming towards him.

"Shoulda just shut the door.." Phil mumbled.

"Babe, are you okay?" Chris asked as he approached him.

Phil nodded, giving Chris a weak smile. Chris, as much as he wished his lover would smile again, knew it was a fake smile.

Chris wrapped his arms around his boyfriend, feeling how Phil literally melted into his touch.

"Why is it that when I least want human interaction, everyone wants to talk to me." Phil grumbled, it was more of a statement then a question.

Chris knew his boyfriend didn't mean to be harsh, he was just upset. "I don't know, baby. If you want me to leave I will.."

"No, no not you. AJ was just here, I swear she is 99 pounds of pure evil, and then Dolph came to threaten me.. I just love the WWE." Phil sighed, earning a chuckle from Chris.

"What'd AJ do?"

"Well, first she apologize for what Dolph said, then she told me I looked hot when I was defending myself, then she didn't understand that I'm gay, then the said she'd have me head over heels in love with her." Phil reminisced.

"You know, she had a point." Chris said, causing Phil to raise an eyebrow.

"You did look hot when you were defending yourself." Chris said with a cheeky grin, earning a soft punch from his boyfriend.

"Not in the mood, babe." Phil sighed.

Everything fell silent as Phil snuggled closer to Chris.

"I don't wanna leave you." Phil said, shaking his head against Chris's chest.

"I don't want you to leave, either. But I want you to get better.." Chris trailed off.

"Yeah, I know." Phil sighed. "I just wish you could be with me, you know?"

"Yeah, baby, I wish I could be with you too. C'mon, let's go back to the hotel.

And so they went back to the hotel, to say goodbye to each-other in their own special way.

* * *

_**ooooooo I don't really remember what I wrote in this chapter so yeah Dolph you're an ass btw.**_  
_**I'm so pissed about mitb like it was good the matches were good but the only ones I was happy about were the preshow & divas match. I hate you heyman & ziglee was one of the only two not-gay couples I shipped. okokok bye**_


	12. Chapter 12

**Save Me.**  
**Chapter 12.**  
**Word Count: 971**

* * *

"I don't wanna leave." Phil whispered, burying his face in the crooked of his boyfriends neck.

"I know, baby. I don't want you to go either. But it'll be okay.. We can Skype every night, and I'll call and text you every day."

Phil bit his lip, nodding. He didn't want to leave. He wanted to stay with his boyfriend, but he knew he needed this.

"Last call for Flight 162." An overly cheery voice sounded throughout the airport.

"I love you, Chris.." Phil sighed, lifting his bags from the ground.

"I love you too.. I'll see you in two weeks." Chris frowned, pulling his lover in for one final hug.

"Two weeks?" Phil mumbled.

"RAW will be in Chicago. You gotta go catch your flight, babe. I love you."

"I love you too." Phil pulled out of the hold and drop his bags, wrapping his arms around Chris's neck, pulling him closer and kissing him hard.

That's when the camera flashed.

* * *

"'CM Punk and Chris Jericho Are In Love.. With Each Other?'" Phil read the cover of People magazine to his best friend.

"How the hell.." Jeff mumbled.

"I may have kissed him in the airport.." Phil sighed, biting his nails.

"Oh, smart." Jeff said sarcastically.

"I just.. What am I gonna do? 'Punkicho' has been trending on twitter for like an hour!"

"Punkicho?"

"Punk as in CM Punk, Icho as in Jericho." Punk explained, rolling his eyes. "Duh."

"Oh, right." Jeff chuckled. "Well I don't know man.. Join the witness protection program?"

"Are you high or something? Joining the witness protection program wouldn't really be necessary."

"Crap, I gotta go. I'll text you later."

"Wait, Jeff?" Phil attempted to speak to his southern friend, but he'd already hung up.

Phil groaned and threw himself down on his bed. Then, he looked at the clock, seeing it was 3:27 AM. He grinned and opened his laptop, loading Skype and signing in. He saw that Chris was online.

He pressed video call, taking note of how quickly Chris answered.

"Hey, babe." Chris said, watching as Phil shifted positions. He moved so his laptop was at the foot of the bed, then he grabbed a pillow and placed it in front of his laptop, then rested his chin on it so he could see Chis.

"Hey." Phil said with a small smile.

"What time is it? You look tired."

"3:30 AM." Phil said.

"Why are you still up, then? You need sleep."

"Because it's 11 where you are, and I know RAW just ended, so I stayed up to talk to you." Phil admitted, smiling sheepishly. "Beside, I'm not that tired. Not that I sleep, anyways." Phil chuckled.

"Aren't you taking those sleeping pills?" Phil shook his head 'no'.

"Why not?" Chris said, sounding confused.

"Because they're the same pills Jeff overdosed on.." Chris nodded, understanding. "Beside, they cause weight gain." Phil chuckled.

"You've been eating, right?" Chris asked, causing Phil to roll his eyes.

"I've been gone for three days, babe. And yes, I have."

"How much?"

"Enough." Phil frowned. "Let's talk about something else."

Chris sighed and nodded, knowing not to push it any further.

"You saw the article, right?" Phil asked.

"No?"

"One sec." Phil got up and grabbed the magazine, then returned to his previous position in his bed.

"Well, we're on the cover of People magazine." Phil said, holding up the magazine.

"I was wondering why there were so many JeriPunk signs in the crowd tonight."

"It's Punkicho." Phil corrected, earning a laugh from Chris.

"So you don't care about this?" Phil ask, slightly shocked.

"Of course not. I mean, I don't care that people know. As long as it means I can kiss you whenever I want." Chris teased.

Phil giggled a bit. He loved Chris's sense of humor. Chris never failed to make him smile, it was one of Phil's favorite things about Chris.

"I wish I could kiss you right now." Phil sighed, resting his chin on his arm.

"Yeah, sometimes I wish I could kiss me, too." Chris said with a wink.

"Cocky." Phil chuckled.

"Seriously, though, Phil, go to sleep. It's late."

"No." Phil said sternly.

"Defiant." Chris said. Phil stuck his tongue out at Chris as a response.

"How can I get you to go to sleep? You look like you haven't slept since you got to Chicago."

"Well I know one way.." Phil said with a smirk.

"How about something that's actually possibly?" Chris said with a chuckle.

"Sing me to sleep?" Phil asked suddenly.

"Huh?"

"You could sing me to sleep.. The past few nights I've been listening to your music to fall asleep.." Phil looked down at the bed, looking embarrassed.

"Awww, Philly!" Chris exclaimed, grinning.

"Shut up." Phil hid his face in his pillow.

"Sorry, sorry." Chris chuckled. "Of course I'll sing for you, babe."

So Phil got up and turned off the light, lying in the bed under the covers.

"Goodnight, baby." Phil said, blowing Chris a kiss.

"Goodnight love." Chris said, blowing one back.

Phil made himself comfortable, smiling as he heard Chris sing the words to his favorite song.

After about 10 minutes, Phil was asleep. Although you'd never get him to admit it, Chris watched Phil sleep for nearly 20 minutes. He looked so adorable, with that small smile. So peaceful.

"Goodnight, babe." Chris said, hanging up the call to get ready for bed.

* * *

_**I really don't know where I'm going with this story aksnxonekwnsoxne**_


	13. Chapter 13

**Save Me.**  
**Chapter 13.**  
**Word Count: 2,269**

* * *

"Hello, Phillip. Nice to see you again." His therapist, Dr. Williams, greeted him with a smile.

"Dont. Call me Phillip." Phil said sharply.

"Well, you're in an awfully good mood today. Tell me how things are going." The two were sitting now.

"Bad."

"Well, why is that?" Dr. Williams said, pulling out her notepad.

"I don't know if me coming back to Chicago was supposed to help, but it hasn't. Being away from Chris is worse then I'd imagined. I've been crying a lot more. I miss him so much.." Phil sighed, biting his lip.

"Chris. Tell me about Chris."

"He's great. His everything I could ever ask for. He loves me, he cares, he's funny, he can sing, he's supportive, he's a bit over-protective at times, but for the right reasons, and, to top it all off, he's hot. And he's got the prettiest blue eyes, they're always shining. He's just.. perfect." Phil said with a happy sigh at the end.

"Mhm, mhm.. So how did you two get together?"

"We'd been friends since 2006, since I came to the WWE. In late 2011 I started dating Randy. It was good at first, but he started drinking, and he started hitting me. Not much at first, just a few slaps if I said the wrong thing or whatever. So I started to hang out with Chris a lot more, around mid 2012. I started feeling things for him, but I thought I loved Randy, so I ignored it. Randy got worse the more I saw Chris. About maybe two months ago, I started self harming again, and I started staying with Chris. 17 days ago was when we got together. We actually had a fight, which is what got us together." Phil reflected, watching as she scribbled on her notepad.

"Hm. What was this fight about?"

"Now that I think about it, I'm not even sure. I think he said something to me, but I don't know what."

"Okay, okay.. So, how do you feel around Chris?"

Phil bit his lip. "Happy. Safe. Loved."

"How about when he's not around?"

"Depressed, lonely, unwanted, hated, scared, worthless and sometimes suicidal."

"So how does Chris change all this?"

"I don't know. Maybe it's how positive he always is, he always looks at the good rather then the bad. Or how he just always takes my mind off things, I just forget everything that's wrong with my life."

Dr. Williams smiled. "Good. Now, enough about Chris. How've you been lately?"

"I've been alright."

"Have your meds been working for you?"

"No, not really. They haven't done much."

"You've been taking them, correct?" She narrowed her eyes at Phil.

"For the most part, yes."

"Hm?"

"I won't take the sleeping pills."

"Why is that?"

Phil sighed. "My friend Jeff used to have a drug problem.. He overdosed on sleeping pills and almost died. They're the same ones I'm supposed to take.. but I won't."

She nodded, seeing what he meant. "Alright. Instead of prescriptions, I recommend you pick up a bottle of Melatonin. Take two or three each night, it should help you fall asleep, and they won't harm your body."

"Okay." Phil gave a small smile.

"So how haven't they been working?"

"Well.. I don't think Prozac is something I should take.. I've heard that it makes people more depressed and.. I was thinking about suicide last night."

"Why?"

"Hate messages, phone calls from ex's."

"Ah. I'll give you a high dose of Wellbutrin, then. I recommend that you don't drive or operate heavy machinery after taking them, and you shouldn't drink any alcohol while taking them , but I don't need to worry about that with you. Now, how about the anxiety medication?"

Phil shook his head. "Hasn't help much. There was a knock on my door and I nearly had a heart attack."

"Why is that?"

"Because I'm scared of Randy.."

"Well who did it end up being?"

"Girl scouts selling cookies.." Phil looked down, embarrassed.

"Oh, Phil." His therapist laughed, shaking her head. "I'll up your dosage of that as well. Same rules as the other pills."

Phil nodded.

"Now, have you cut since I last saw you?"

"Nope." Phil said, and he wasn't exactly lying..

"Have you been eating?"

"Yeah."

"How much?"

"Enough." Phil's defiant side was coming out.

"Guess I'll have to take your word for it. Alright, I'll see you in three days." His doctor said with a smile, handing him the prescription paper.

Phil nodded with a small smile and headed out.

* * *

Phil walked in to the 24 hour pharmacy at nearly 2AM. He walked up to the counter, as there was obviously no line-up. He silently handed him the prescription. The man scoffed as he read it.

"How many more depressed kids are gonna be coming in tonight?" He shook his head as he rung it up.

"I'm 34, ass." Phil rolled his eyes.

"Anti-Anxiety pills and anti-depressants at two AM. Drug dealer?"

"Will you just give me my fucking pills?!" Phil nearly yelled.

"Woah, inpatient." The man handed the paper off to a young woman, who took it to fill it.

"Ten minutes. Hopefully your customers can last that long."

Phil clenched his fists. "I'm not a drug dealer, and I'm not a fucking kid. I'm a professional wrestler and if you don't shut the fuck up I will punch you so ha-"

"Oh, wait, aren't you that CM Punk guy?"

Phil gave a short nod. "Why do you care?"

"Imagine if people found out that you were on anxiety and depression meds." The man chuckled evilly.

"I don't have time for this." Phil pulled his headphones up from around his neck and sat in a chair, ignoring the man.

A few minutes later he felt a tap on his shoulder. He looked up, seeing the woman from behind the counter there, and he pulled his headphones back down around his neck.

"Here you are, sir. I'm so sorry about Al, he never likes working the night shift." She said with a small smile.

"Dont worry about it." Phill offered a small smile. "Hey, do I know you from somewhere? You look familiar.."

"Um, I don't know?"

"What's your name?"

"Miranda.. Miranda Clark." She said, a confused smile on her face.

Phil's face lot up. "Did you go to East Chicago High?"

"Yeah?"

"Oh my god. It's Phil."

"Phil?!" She exclaimed, throwing her arms around him. "I thought I'd never see you again!"

"I missed you so much." Phil wrapped his arms around her small frame.

Miranda was Phil's best friend when he was in school. She moved away at the end of 11th grade, and they didn't stay in contact afterwards.

"I've missed you too." She sighed happily.

Miranda was a small girl with light brown hair and greyish-blue eyes. She was thin, but not underweight. She had snakebites, as well as an eyebrow piercing, angel bites and the bridge of her nose pierced. Miranda's ears were stretched, and she had a bar in her left ear.

"Wanna tell me why you're on these pills?" Miranda asked, not pulling away.

Phil sighed. "It's a story for another time."

"Alright. Well I gotta get back to work, cause you know, its so busy." Miranda said sarcastically. "Can I see your phone?"

"Mhm." Phil pulled his phone from his pocket and handed it to her, and she gave him his.

"Who's that?" Miranda said with a smile as she looked at his wallpaper.

"My boyfriend Chris." Phil said, blushing as he entered his number into her phone.

"Since when did you like guys? You used to be such a ladies man."

"After I dropped out. Long story." Phil said with a smile.

"Alright. What's your pass code?" Phil typed it in for her then handed her back his phone.

"I should get back to work before Al throughs a bitch fit."

They handed each other back their phones, hugged, said goodbye, and headed off in their own directions.

* * *

"Hey." Phil said as he answered his phone.

"Heeeey baby."

"Seth, you're drunk, go to sleep." Phil sighed as he looked at the clock, seeing it was 3:46AM.

"B-But I love youuuu." Seth slurred.

"Seth, I'm dating Chris. Do me favor, will you?"

"Anythinnn' fer you babee."

"Go to Jon's hotel room, alright?" Phil bit his lip, looking back at his laptop.

"Okeee." He heard a door close, then another one open. "Im hurrr."

"Now give him the phone."

"Hey?" Jon said, sounding tired.

"Take care of Seth, he's drunk." Phil sighed.

"Alright. Did he wake you up?"

"Nah, I don't sleep." Phil chuckled. "I'll talk to you later."

Phil hung up after Jon said 'bye'. Phil turned back to his laptop, scrolling down his twitter feed. He saw lots of tweets (mostly from fans he'd followed) about a girl named Talia, who'd apparently passed. Phil opened a new tab and typed "Talia Castellano" in the search bar, then pressed enter.

Phil learned that the girl was 13, made YouTube videos, and had cancer. She'd been in the hospital for the past few weeks, and had died earlier that day. Phil closed the tab and went back to twitter, typing up a tweet.

I never really knew who Talia was till now, but it's sad to see her go. Rest in peace, little one.

Phil closed his laptop and leaned back against his pillows, looking at the ceiling. He hadn't cut in at least a week, and withdrawal was setting in. While he could honestly tell you he hadn't cut, he couldn't say he hadn't self harmed. Phil felt his hands started to shake and he bit his lip. He picked up his phone and dialed Chris's number. If anyone could calm him down, it was his boyfriend.

"Babe? What is it? It's like four in the morning." Chris said tiredly.

"'M sorry.. Go back t-to sleep.."

"No, baby what's wrong?" Chris sounded much more awake now.

"I'm.. I just.. I need.. h-help?" Phil said weakly.

"What's wrong?"

"I-I don't know.. Don't feel right.." Phil mumbled.

"Baby, where are you? Are you hurt?" Chris sounded scared.

"At home.. 'M fine.. I just.. Talk to me?"

"Only if you tell me what's up." Chris said with a sigh.

"My hands are sh-shaking, I feel sick, and I can't stop crying.. Mmm I wanna cut.." Phil said absentmindedly.

"No, you can't do that babe. I want you to take a deep breath, alright? Move away from any sharp objects, okay?"

"O-Okay." Chris heard a bit of shuffling then silence.

"Now what?"

"Just talk to me, okay Philly? It'll be alright."

"C-Can I see you?" Phil whimpered.

"FaceTime is the best I can do." Chris sighed. "Is that okay?"

"Just wanna see your face.." Phil mumbled.

"Okay baby. I'm gonna hang up, I'll call back in a second. Okay?"

"A-Alright.."

When they FaceTimed, Chris felt his heart break a little bit. Phil was curled up into a small ball underneath his window, wrapped in a small brown blanket, shaking, with tears running down his cheeks.

"Philly.. It'll be okay.."Chris soothed.

Phil nodded lightly. "O-Okay."

"Can you turn on a light, babe? I can hardly see you."

Phil nodded, reaching up and pulling the cord on a lamp, switching it on.

"So when did you start feeling this way?"

"I-I don't know.. I was fine then I just started shaking.. What's wrong with m-me?" Phil stuttered.

"Withdrawal, love. It's what happens when you're addicted to something," Chris switched his phone to his other hand. "And you can't have it."

"B-But I'm not a-addicted.."

Chris sighed. "Phil, it's alright. You're getting help, remember?"

Phil nodded. It was then that Chris remember Phil had anti-anxiety pills, which could possibly calm him down.

"Phil, get up and go downstairs, alright?" Phil nodded and stood up, using his free hand to secure the blanket around his shoulders.

He walked out of his bedroom, still shaking, and down the stairs.

"N-Now what?"

"Go into to the kitchen, and grab your anxiety meds."

"Why?" Phil asked, confusion written all over his face.

"Because they'll help. Go get them and take one."

Chris watched as his boyfriend set his phone down, opened the cupboard where his medicine was stored, and swallowed one dry.

"Good. That should help, okay?" Chris said.

Phil nodded, then his head turned in another direction.

"Chrissy.. Someone's here.."

"Philly, nobody's there.. it's just your imagination." Chris sighed.

"N-No.. Someone knocked on the d-door.."

The knock sounded again, but this time louder, loud enough for Chris to hear it.

"Just ignore it, Philly."

But Phil had already gotten up and looked through the peephole.

"Chrissy.. I-It's Randy.."

* * *

_**ooo ooo cliffy this chapter was unintentionally long and rip talia I miss you so much 3: ik it was a few days ago but still /: okok ily byeee**_

_**BTW I've been babysitting my 1 y/o & 3 y/o cousins bc my cousin has to work and they're in a transition house with no daycare (long story) so I haven't been posting chapters because I can edit them.. but I've been writing okay**_


	14. Chapter 14

**Save Me.  
Chapter 14.  
Word Count: 1,331**

* * *

"Phil.. Do not answer it. He doesn't know you're there. Just go upstairs and ignore him.."

"W-Why is he here? He should be with the WWE.." Phil said, scared. Nobody was there to help him this time.

"Phil, I can fucking hear you! Open this door before I break it the fuck down!" Randy yelled, banging on the door.

"C-Chrissy I'm sc-scared.. Help me.." Phil stuttered, staring at the door.

"Phillip Jack Brooks, open this damn door NOW!"

"O-Okay.." Phil whimpered.

"Phil, don't open it!" Chris yelled.

But Phil was already on the way to the door. He unlocked it, but kept the chain lock locked. He pulled the door open as far as the chain allowed.

"Phil why the hell are you here!? You're supposed to be with me!" Randy screamed.

"Randy.. I'm with C-Chris.."

"Aw, was the baby crying?" Randy mocked, noting his swollen red eyes and dry tears on his cheeks. "Or was he getting high?"

"Randy.. Please leave me alone.. I don't wanna do this right now." Phil whispered.

"Open the door." Randy commanded. "You're coming with me."

"N-No Randy.. I-I'm not going anywhere.. Please let me go to bed.." Phil pleaded.

"No. Why aren't you traveling with the WWE right now?"

"I could ask you the same." Phil retorted.

"Injury. Now why the hell are you here?"

"Because I n-needed a break. Now can I please go to bed?" Phil whimpered.

"Fine. I'm coming back in the morning."

Phil slammed the door and locked it.

"I wanna go to sleep and never wake up." Phil whispered, a tear falling down his cheek.

"No baby. I need you. The fans need you. Jeff needs you. Selene needs you. We all need you, Phil. You can't just go."

"Who are you trying to kid? How have I honestly done anything but make y-your life worse? I'm not important.." Phil sighed, telling how he honesty felt.

"You make me happy, babe. When you aren't around, it hurts like hell. If anything, you've made my life better. Phil, I know you've had bad relationships in the past, but I really care about you. I love you."

Phil was silent for a moment. "I-I love you too.."

"Now come Philly, you need to go to sleep." Chris said, looking at the clock. 5:17AM.

Phil nodded and stood up, looking out the window to make sure Randy was gone. He then went back upstairs and into his room, then went straight to his bed.

"Will you sing for me again?" Phil asked shyly. "It really helped last night.."

"Of course babe."

Phil made himself comfortable, as did Chris, then Chris started singing.

_I_ _never meant to be the one  
Who kept you from the dark  
But now I know my wounds are sewn  
Because of who you are  
I will take this burden on  
And become the holy one  
But remember I am human  
And I'm bound to sing this song_

_So hear my voice remind you not to bleed  
I am here,  
Saviour will be there  
When you are feeling alone, oh  
A saviour for all that you do  
So you live freely without their harm_

_So here I write my lullaby  
To all the lonely ones  
Remember as you learn to try  
To be the one you love_  
_So I can take this pen  
And teach you how to live  
What is left unsaid  
The greatest gift I give_

_So hear my voice remind you not to bleed  
I am here,  
Saviour will be there  
When you are feeling alone, oh  
A saviour for all that you do  
So you live freely without their harm_

_Saviour will be there  
When you are feeling alone, oh  
A saviour for all that you do  
So you live freely without their harm_

_When I hear your cries  
Praying for life  
I will be there_

"Goodnight, baby." Chris said to his lovers sleeping form. "I love you."

* * *

"Hey." Phil said as he answered his phone.

"Hey love. Are you feeling better?" His boyfriend asked.

"Yeah, much better. Hey, what was that song you were singing?"

"Savior by Black Veil Brides. I don't listen to that band much anymore, but that song seemed fitting." Chris said, with a small smile even though Phil couldn't see it.

"I'll have to look them up." Phil said, sitting at his kitchen table.

"So you really haven't been cutting?" Chris asked.

"Mhm."

"You haven't harmed yourself in anyway?"

"Nope." Phil hated lying to Chris but.. what he didn't know wouldn't hurt him.

"I'm so proud of you baby." Chris sighed happily.

"Phil, c'mon, you're coming with me." The all-to-familiar voice yelled.

"Phil don't say anything. The door is locked, yeah?"

"Mhm." Phil whispered so quietly Chris almost didn't hear him.

"Go up to your room and lock the door. Try not to let him know you're there. Don't turn off or on any lights." Chris was scared for his baby, but he wouldn't let him know that.

It was silent for a few moments, until Phil spoke up.

"I'm in my room, the doors locked. Now what?"

"Move away from the windows so he can't see you. Can you do that for me baby?"

"Chris, I'm in danger, not four years old." Phil said annoyed. When we was upset, he didn't care that Chris was talking to him like that, but he was in the right state of mind, and he wasn't a kid.

"Sorry, love." Chris said with a chuckle.

"Wait.. I can call Miranda.. She'll help me.." Phil said, with a small amount of relief in his tone.

"Who?" Chris's overprotective side was coming out.

"Oh, Miranda.. She was my best friend throughout school.. I saw her at the pharmacy yesterday. She'll help me.."

"Oh." Was Chris's response.

"Chris, please don't be jealous.. You never get jealous when I'm around Nikki & Brie.. Or even when I'm around other guys."

"That's cause I'm there.. Whatever. If she'll help, call her. Call me right back alright? I love you, you're mine." Chris said sternly, as if Phil didn't know.

"I know, baby. I don't like girls. Okay? I love you too." With that, Phil hung up.

He dialed Miranda's number, thinking about what to say to her.

"Hello?" She answered without looking at the caller ID.

"Hey.. Sorry if this is a bad time, but.. I need help."

* * *

Once Miranda came to the house, Randy left. Like, sped away. He probably thought Phil told her why he was here, which he had.

"Chris, this is Miranda." Phil said to his boyfriend over Skype. "Miranda, this is my boyfriend, Chris."

"Nice to meet you." Miranda said with a smile.

"You too." Chris mumbled, earning an eye roll from Phil.

"Someone's jealous."

"Hey, I am not." Chris defended.

"Well, I should get going, my shift starts soon. I'll text you later." Miranda smiled. "Nice meeting you Chris. Bye Phil." She gave Phil a quick hug, then headed off.

"I don't trust her." Chris said.

"Chris, this is stupid." Phil groaned.

"How?" Chris asked.

"I like penis."

Chris chuckled. "You have no boundaries, do you?"

"That I don't." Phil said with a cheeky grin.

* * *

"What is it, Jeff?" Phil groaned.

He'd finally fallen asleep when his phone rang. It was 2:16AM and he just wanted to sleep.

"Nevermind.. Go back to sleep.." Jeff sighed.

"No, what is it?" Jeff didn't sound all cheery like normal, and that worried Phil.

"I can't believe myself Phil.. I cheated on Adam.."

* * *

**_o: jeffro why you do this to adam w h y. oh btw ik Chris & Phil probably don't listen to bands like black veil brides but_** **_I_** **_do_** **_ok so in my_** **_story they do alright_** **_ily_** **_byeee_**


	15. Chapter 15

Save Me.  
Chapter 15.  
Word Count:

"You what?!" Phil yelled.

"I don't know, I just.. I don't know."

"Why the hell did you do that? Where is Adam? Who was it with?" Phil questioned.

"I just told you I don't know, alright?! I don't know where he is, he just left."

Phil sighed. "Do you have any idea of where he went?"

"Jay's maybe.. No, probably not.. Shawn. I think he's with Shawn."

"I'll call them both in a minute and find out where he is, alright? And you never told me who it was with." Phil bit his lip, almost not wanting to know.

"I uhh.. Ya know how I said he's probably not with Jay?"

"Jeff.."

"That's why." Jeff mumbled, conforming Phil's prediction.

"God, Jeff.. Is there something you're not telling me?"

"No?" It was more of a question then a statement.

"Spill."

"I can't.." Jeff sighed.

"Yeah you can."

"I'll tell you after you find out where Adam is."

"Just.. why his best friend?" Phil sighed.

"I don't fucking know okay? Just.. Find him and call me back."

"I'll try.." Phil mumbled, hanging up.

Phil figured Adam wouldn't be at Jay's, considering the reason he left was partly Jay, and decided to call Shawn first. Of course, he and Shawn were never all that close, so he had to ask Chris for his number.

_Babe, I need Shawn's number. -Phil_

_why? -Chris_

_Because its important. I'll tell you later, just give me his number. -Phil_

_alright. XXX XXX XXXX -Chris_

_Thanks baby. -Phil_

Without waiting for a reply, he typed in Shawn's number. He picked up on the third ring.

"Hi?" Shawn asked, confused because he didn't know the number.

"Hi, Shawn? It's Phil Brooks. Is Adam there by any chance?"

"Do I know a Phil Brooks?" Phil rolled his eyes.

"CM Punk."

"Ahhh, yes. Adam is here, why?"

"Could I speak to him? Or is he too upset?" Phil asked, concerned.

"I'll ask him." Shawn said.

Phil heard muffled voices down the line for a brief moment, before a raspy voice spoke.

"Hello?" Adam mumbled.

"God Adam, I can't believe Jeff would do that.. I understand how upset you are, but.. You need to talk to him."

"No, not tonight at least."

"Even if it's not till tomorrow, or next week, or even next month, you need to talk to him. He loves you, I promise, and I know you love him too. He made a mistake, I don't know why, but he did, and he's feels worse then shit because of it. He needs you just like you need him. You'd have to be a fool to intentionally hurt someone like you. When you're ready, talk to him. I'm sure he's got a lot to say."

"Thanks, Phil. I needed that." Adam sniffled. "Can you do me a favor or two?"

"Of course."

"Can you call Jeff and tell him I'll be coming tomorrow to talk and probably get my stuff, and could you also call Jay and tell him to never talk to me again?" Adam asked shyly.

"Will do." Phil chuckled. "If you need anything, you've got my number. I'll talk to you later."

"Alright. Thanks again."

They said their goodbyes and hung up. Phil dialed Jeff's number, deciding to call him first.

"Did you talk to him?" Jeff said when he answered.

"Yeah. He wanted me to tell you he's coming by tomorrow to talk, and possibly get his stuff, if you can't work it out. Also, he wants me to tell Jay to never talk to him again. Will you tell me now why you cheated?"

"Promise you won't be mad?" Jeff mumbled.

"Maybe."

"I uh.. I was high?"

* * *

"Chrissy, Jeff is on drugs again. He cheated on Adam, with Jay might I add. I have to go down there." Phil ranted to his boyfriend as he paced around his kitchen.

"When do you see your doctor again?" Chris sighed.

"Tomorrow morning."

"Ask her. If she thinks it's a good idea, then you can go, but otherwise no."

"Thanks, baby." It was a silent for a moment. "I miss you." Phil mumbled, sitting down.

"I miss you too. Do you know how boring it is backstage when I can't fuck with you before you have a match?" Chris teased.

"That is definitely one thing I am not missing." Phil shook his head.

"Well baby, I'm going to bed. I'll talk to you in the morning. Goodnight beautiful."

Phil blushed. "Goodnight babe. I love you."

"I love you too. Get some sleep, it's late. Goodnight." With that, Chris hung up.

Phil headed upstairs and sighed. He missed the sound of Chris's voice already. He laid in his bed and opened his laptop, going on to YouTube.

He spent the better part of two hours watching old Y2J promos, before he decided to get some rest. He plugged his iPhone into his speakers, turn the volume down a little, and started playing 'Inside My Head' by Fozzy. Three songs later and he was finally asleep, his music still playing.

;line break;

How'd it go with Adam? -Phil

he said he wants time 2 think so he's staying wit shawn 4 now -Jeff

I'm sorry, man. I'm coming down there, alright? I've gotta talk to my doctor first but I'm coming, leaving tonight hopefully. -Phil

its fine phil. u need help remember -Jeff

I don't care. You need it more then I do right now. -Phil

i beg to differ -Jeff

Sucks for you, I'm coming anyways. -Phil

alright -Jeff

"Phil Brooks?" Phil stood up, following the receptionist down the hall.

"She'll be here momentarily." Phil nodded, sitting down on one of the two chairs.

Moments later, his doctor entered the room.

"Hello, Phil. How're you this morning?" She said, smiling as she took a seat in the chair facing Phil.

"I could be better I guess." Phil shrugged.

"Why is that?"

"I need to go to North Carolina." Phil stated.

"Why?" Dr. Williams asked, genuinely confused.

"My friend, Jeff, lives down there. He's the one who's had substance abuse issues in the past. He relapsed, cheated on his boyfriend, his boyfriend left him, and he needs me.. He was there when I needed him, I need to be there for him now. I was talking to Chris about it last night and he said that I could only go if you thought it was a good idea.."

His doctor thought for a moment before smiling. "Sure. I think it'd be great for you to see your friend, and he needs you right? When do you plan on leaving?"

"Tonight I hope."

"Alright. Well, I'll just ask you a few questions then you can go." She said, grabbing a clipboard from the shelf.

"Have you been cutting, or self harming in any way?"

"No."

"Have you had any panic attacks?"

"I don't know."

"You don't know?"

"It was different. Withdrawal, Chris says." Phil briefly explained.

"Ah. Had any suicidal thoughts?"

"They never go away." Phil chuckled bitterly.

"Have your meds been working?"

"Yep."

"Alright. So how do you plan on getting to Carolina?"

"Plane."

His doctor nodded. "When do you think you'll be back?"

"Hard to say right now."

"Okay. Well if you aren't back within a week, send me an email so I know you're alright. I'll see you soon." She smiled and stood up, as did Phil.

The two left, and Phil didn't bother scheduling another appointment, seeing as he didn't know when he'd be back. He pulled up his hood and started walking, pulling his phone out of his pocket in the process. Phil decided to go through the alleyways, to avoid fans. He dialed Chris's number as he turned down a dark alley.

"Hey babe." Chris said as he answered.

"Hey." Phil said with a smile, he loved hearing Chris's voice.

"What's up?"

"Just left the doctors, I'm going to see Jeff tonight."

"When?"

"Soonest flight I can catch." Phil mumbled, getting a little creeped out by the dark alleyway.

"Everything alright love?" Chris said, noticing the way Phil lowered his voice.

"Yeah." Phil said quietly. "Just a little creeped out.."

"Why?"

"I didn't wanna get noticed so I went the back way to get home but it's kinda creepy, it looks like somewhere drug dealers & pedophiles would hang out." Phil explained, earning a chuckle from Chris.

"Hey, don't laugh. It's sc-" Phil was cut off when he walked into another body.

* * *

_**dun dun DUNNNNN!**_  
_**who do you think it is?**_  
_**I've already written the next chapter but.. I'm not posting it till tomorrow (evil laugh) byeeee ilyg**_


	16. Chapter 16

**Save Me.**  
**Chapter 16.**  
**Word Count: 1,688**

* * *

"Well, well. What do we have here?" A tall figured said, standing over him.

"Who are you? What do you want?" Phil said, backing away and panicking slightly.

"I want.." The man paused, stepping forward. "_You_."

"W-What?"

"Phil? Phil is everything alright?" He'd totally forgotten he was talking to Chris.

_'Hang up. Now.'_ The man mouthed.

"I'll have to call you back.." Phil then hung up, returning his iPhone to his pocket.

The man pushed him against the brick wall, pushing his hand over Phil's mouth as he tried to screamed.

"Shut up. Now we can do this the easy way or the ha- FUCK!" Phil cut the man off by kneeing him in balls.

He started running, but he wasn't fast enough. Running had never been one of his specialties. He felt arms wrap around his chest, a hand covering his mouth once more.

"You little shit!" His attacker screamed.

He reached into his pocket, pulling out a rather large blade, to which Phil widen his eyes at. Sure, Phil was suicidal, but this wasn't they way he wanted to go.

The man press the knife to Phil's neck lightly, pushing him against the wall again.

"You've got such a pretty mouth Phil.. Wonder what it could do.." He purred menacingly.

Phil swallowed hard, feeling the knife move against his throat.

"Put him down!" A familiar voice growled, grabbing the man from behind.

Phil watched in shock as Randy attack the man. He brought his fingers up to his neck, feeling a line of warm liquid forming. He watched as Randy stood up, satisfied by the beating he'd given the man.

"Are you alright?" Randy asked as he approached Phil.

The smaller man hung his head in shame, giving a small nod. He waited silently for Randy to start telling him how weak he is. But instead, much to Phil's surprise, he felt two strong arms wrap around him.

"God, you scared me so much."

"I uhh.. Thanks.." Phil mumbled shyly, mentally cursing as he leaned his head on Randy's chest.

"Look, Phil I'm sorry for everything. I know you're with Chris now but.. please give me another chance." Randy pleaded, pulling away and looking into Phil's eyes.

"Randy.." Phil sighed. "I can't just do that to Chris. I really love him.. and I loved you too.. But after everything you've done to me.. You abused me, I started cutting again because of you, you tortured me, followed me, stalked me, wouldn't leave me alone, insulted me.." Phil paused. "I can't give you another chance."

"Oh.. I understand.." Randy hung his head, feeling like shit.

"But.. maybe we can try and be friends..?"

"Really?" Randy looked up.

"Yeah. And since you're my friend now, may I ask you a favor?"

"Of course, friend." Randy chuckled.

"Can we get the hell out of here before he wakes up?"

"Sure." Randy said with a smile.

He had Phil fooled, Randy didn't wanna be friends. And one way or another, he _would_ get what he wanted.

* * *

"So, lets get this straight. A guy attacked you in an alley, put a knife to your throat, implied that he was gonna try and rape you, Randy came out of nowhere, saved you, asked you for another chance, you said no, now you're friends." Chris said, repeating what his boyfriend had told him.

"Yeah, pretty much."

"And you're trusting Randy to not hurt you again?"

"Kinda." Phil sighed.

"Kinda?"

"Yeah. I don't fully trust him, like I'll talk to him on the phone, text him whatever, but in person.. I'd rather have someone else around." Phil explained.

"I don't know, please be careful. So where are you now?"

"Airport. Speaking of which, I should probably board my flight. I'll call you once I land, alright?"

"Alright. I love you. Don't forget to call me when you get there, I miss hearing your voice." This made Phil blush. "Have a safe flight."

"I will. I love you too. Bye sexy."

He hung up and stood, grabbing his two suitcases and bringing them over to the terminal. He boarded his flight after showing the woman his ticket.

* * *

_Hey, I'm here. _-Phil

_k, im outside _-Jeff

Phil headed outside, looking for Jeff's black Honda Civic. He saw Jeff leaning against it, smoking a cigarette, staring at the ground. He approached the man, talking lightly on his shoulders. Jeff jumped and looked up at him with bloodshot eyes.

Phil didn't wait for Jeff to responded, he just wrapped his arms around him.

"Hey.." Jeff whispered, wrapping his arms around Phil's neck and resting his head on the younger mans chest.

"Hey, Jeffro.. I missed you.."

"I missed you too.." Jeff sighed. "Let's go to my place, yeah?" Jeff said, pulling away.

"Alright." Phil put his suitcases into the backseat and sat in the passengers seat.

Jeff put out his cigarette and climbed into the car, glancing at Phil and giving him a weak smile.

"So," Jeff started the car "What new?" He asked, trying to make conversation.

"Eh, nothing." Phil shrugged, avoiding telling him about how he'd almost gotten raped just a few hours earlier. "Obviously you've got stuff going on."

Jeff just shrugged as they drove towards his house. He pressed a button on the CD player, a band that Phil didn't know playing.

"C'mon, Jeff. Did you really think I wasn't gonna ask you?"

"I was hoping." Jeff mumbled.

The two drove in silence (aside from the alternative music playing through the speakers) until they arrived at the house.

Phil grabbed his suitcases and followed Jeff inside, surprised by how clean it was.

"Alright, let's put your stuff away." The older man led Phil to the spare room.

The first thing Phil notice was the wall color.

"Pink?" He smirked, cocking an eyebrow.

"Adam insisted." Jeff said with a smile.

Phil chuckled and put his bags on the bed, following the smaller man to the living room.

"So.." Phil said as they sat down together. "Wanna tell me what's going on?"

"You already know. I cheated on my boyfriend, he left me. What more is there?"

"Hm.. Maybe why you're doing drugs again..?" Phil said sarcastically.

"Oh that."

"Jeff. Talk." The younger man demanded.

"What is there to say?" Jeff mumbled, moving his gaze to his hands. "I relapsed. You know what it's like."

"Yeah. But there's a difference between us. For you to relapse on drugs, you have to get them from somewhere, and they aren't easy to get. So where did you get them, for starters."

"Vicodin isn't hard to get," Jeff countered. "I have back problems, and it's a pain killer. I never stopped taking it, really, I just only took it when I needed it, and only how much I needed to take.."

"Jeff, I promise I'll get you help."

Jeff just offered a weak smile.

"But, I wanna know.. Sure you were on drugs but.. Why Jay?"

"I guess I wanted to hurt Adam as bad as possible. We had a small fight that night, I literally don't remember what it was about. I guess I wanted to get back at him?"

Phil shook his head. "I hope you guys work this out. He really loves you, you know."

"I love him, too. God, I can't believe I did that.."

"I can't believe you did it either." Phil teased, earning a soft slap on his arm.

"Oh, shush." Jeff hissed. "So tell me how you've been."

"Uh," Phil said nervously. "I'm here for you, not-"

"I asked you a question. Answer me." Jeff snapped.

"Woah, okay, okay." Phil sighed. "I'm fine. You don't need to worry about me, you're the one who-"

"Oh bullshit. Tell me how you're doing- honestly."

"Depressed, tired. I don't know. There's not much, everything's the same." Phil shrugged.

"You're lying." Jeff stated quickly.

"Uh.."

"You think I don't know you? I can tell somethings-" Jeff was cut off by Phil's phone.

Phil pulled his phone out of his pocket and cursed under his breath. Kofi.

"Shit. I gotta take this." Phil stood up and walked into the kitchen, answering his phone.

"Hey?"

"My god, mate! Where have you been? I haven't seen you around in nearly a week!" His friend exclaimed.

"I took some time off.. Sorry I didn't tell you.." Phil sighed.

"Why did you leave?" Kofi sounded concerned.

"I've had some problems. Nothing major, really."

"Like, injury?" Kofi asked. He hadn't told the Jamaican about his past (or present) with self-harm, so he decided not to do it now.

"Uh, something like that."

"You're confusing me, mate." Kofi chuckled. "Where are you?"

"North Carolina. I came to visit Jeff."

"Oh. Well I'll let you go now. Text me or something, alright?"

"Okay." Phil smiled slightly. "I'll talk to you later."

"Bye."

Phil hung up and headed back to the living room.

"Kofi." Phil shrugged.

Jeff yawned. "Mm.. I'm tired."

"Yeah, me too. We'll, uh, finish this conversation in the morning?" Jeff nodded.

The two got up and headed upstairs.

"Goodnight." Jeff mumbled as he headed into his room.

"Hey," Phil said, making Jeff turn around. "Everything will be okay, eventually." Phil wrapped his arms around his best friends small frame.

He felt the smaller mans shoulders shake as he leaned into Phil.

He let the older man cry until he was done, he just held him as Jeff sobbed against his shirt.

"Sorry." Jeff sniffled as he pulled back, wiping his eyes.

"Dont worry about it. Now, lets get some sleep okay?"

Jeff nodded and the two parted, heading off to their rooms to get some sleep.

* * *

**guys.. I'm seriously so sorry. I wrote about half this chapter, then I went to camp, came back, finished most of it, and just finished the chapter today.**  
**so schools started again, it's my first year in middle school and today was my first full day and I hate it.**

**but I've had so much anxiety and depression and writers block (thanks to school) so sadly, I'm putting this story on hold.**  
**it won't be for long, I'll probably start writing again early to mid October.**  
**I'm sorry, I hope you guys understand. love you all, byee xx**


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